Tired, Stupid, and Lazy.

This has been one _damn_ long weekend.  Not that I've done much that
was useful or entertaining, though.  That's why I rely on my readers
to pitch in occasionally.  Many thanks to UnoMike, stavros, and jank/
the Doc for submissions.  I'm too tired to do much work on my own and
I have very little to actually say.  

(Take a hint and submit your own net.finds if you're not a regular
WU submitter.)

Here's one bit of _great_ news.  The WU has it's own business address!
If you have pictures to scan, or items to send, or you just feel like
contributing to the death of trees and _have_ to send me some snail
mail, here's where to send:

Johnny Rollerfeet
c/o the Weekend Update
13729 Research Suite 610-148
Austin, TX   78750

The astute among you will notice that this address has been added
to the footer of the WU so that you'll always be able to find it!

*********************************************************************

This probably doesn't deserve it's own section, but the longer
I have to live and breath (and lose sleep) without knowing the 
duck story (http://linex.com:80/~alibee/ducks.html) the less
meaning my life has, and the more meaning a duckling's life 
seems to have.  

I'd like to thank alibee for putting a link to my page, and I
even understand her scorn for my thirst for knowledge, but I
must know...

Stay tuned.

*********************************************************************

[ From UnoMike@aol.com, the lead singer of HSO, comes some ]
[ information about the band.  I'll be putting currently   ]
[ unavailable sound bites up on the HSO web page (which    ]
[ can be found at http://www.eden.com/~etrigan/hso), and   ]
[ I'll also be putting the following tour info (and a NEW  ]
[ discography) on the page.                                ]

Here are some tour dates [for Habitual Sex Offenders]:

September 
23- The Venue Formerly known as the Wet Bar, Shreveport, LA (ALL AGES)
October
5- Ciceros, St. Louis, MO (tenative)
6- Ocean Club, Longview, TX
7- Fitzgeralds, Houston, TX (ALL AGES, we are playing very early 9 or 10 PM)
12- Stonewall Tavern, Stillwater, OK
13- Xenophon, Tulsa, OK
21- Cantina, Corpus Christi, TX
25- Hole In The Wall, Austin, TX
27- TBA, Murphysborough, TN
29- Barristers, Memphis, TN
November 
17- Sluggo's, Pensacola, FL

*********************************************************************

If you're like me (and your local paper carries these cutting
edge columns) then the first thing you do when the paper comes
out is to flip to these sections ignoring all else (even the 
Comics page!)  If you're not from Austin, the Austin Chronicle's
page won't do you much good, but this URL will get you to "News
of the Weird", "The Straight Dope", "Real Astrology", and Austin's
own "Mr Smarty Pants".

http://www.auschron.com/~references.html

*********************************************************************

[ From Steve, , is this review of ]
[ the new cyber-movie, "Hackers".  This is one more ]
[ example of the kind of thing I want from YOU.     ]
[ Many thanks to stavros!                           ]

=====================================================================
== Hackers                           by Stavros [stavros@eden.com] ==
=====================================================================

This "cyberpunk" (I hate that word) thriller was actually pretty
good. It did require a bit of tongue biting falsehoods (who hacks
on a MAC), but those were tolerable enough to still enjoy. Someone
who really knows NYC should actually scope out the locations of the
"BARS" and report on their accuracy. As for the fashion, how many
people can actually afford motorcycle leathers for everyday wears ?

The acting was quite good considering the near no-name actors.
Johnny Lee Miller plays a convicted hacker (malicious behavior at
the age of 11) that quietly becomes the unconscious leader of an
'elite' ring of hackers. The villian, Fisher Stevens, plays a
diabolical hacker by the name of Plague. Stevens has made a great
step forward in his acting career with this role; unfortunately he
will probably be type-cast as a villian because he plays it so well.
As for the rest, except for an attractive young female, played by 
Angelina Jollie (hubba-hubba (for etrigan)), there is not much to
say other than they did not become distractions. By the way, the
one and only Penn Jillete makes a cameo as a SysAdmin.

RATING: Full Price - must see in theatre

*********************************************************************

[ From billjank@ix.netcom.com better known ]
[ as "Jank", the ever prose-full.          ]

[My brother,] The Doctor is on the net .
I enclosed his first letter to me, and am thinking that the Jankowski 
clan may have a gift for prose.  We definately have the beer gene.

    Jank

[ A BIG net.welcome to Doc-  I hope you find ]
[ the net as well as it has found you.  Your ]
[ loving brother forwarded this to me and I  ]
[ plan on using it under the assumption that ]
[ if you didn't want it published you can    ]
[ take it up with him!    : )                ]

---- Begin Forwarded Message

All is well here in [Shreve]Port.  I can't get into bars right now 
because the bastards at Baton Rouge are trying to stick it to me.  

[ Louisiana (as was mentioned last week) just ]
[ changed drinking age from 18 to 21.  There  ]
[ was a loop-hole that if you were a "private ]
[ club member" in a "private club" you could  ]
[ drink between 18 and 21 years of age.  This ]
[ meant that all drinking establishments kept ]
[ a "club member list" at the door and you'd  ]
[ sign it the first time you came to the club ]
[ which made you a member from then on!       ]

They closed the loophole, but someone took it to court the day it 
went into effect.  The night before I got all shit faced and was on 
channel 6 news at 10.  Good thing ma and pa don't watch 6.

[ or surf the 'net! ]

I had 3 drafts and then I heard a pitcher calling my name.  It said, 
and this is a direct quote,"Matt, I want you to come over here and 
buy me, then you will drink from me."  I said aaaahhhh yes.  Then 
since I hadn't eaten in 8 hours, the wonderful brew, wouldn't sit 
exactly right and I spewed some beer right there in Mias.  Then there 
was this cool ass wreck outside that broke the telephone pole and 
broke a transformer, rendering Shooter's out of business for the night.  
Mike Sanchez came up with the great idea of asking Ivan for free draft 
so the keg wouldn't gat all warm and nasty.  Ivan declined.  But back 
to the loophole.  The bill closing it was overturned by a district 
judge for the whole state, so the state appealed it to the state 
Supreme Court, which is where it stands.  I'm fairly sure that the 
least they'll do is to put a Grandfather Clause on it like they did 
the driving age, which will put me back in business.

Have you heard the wonderful news?  Jerry Jeff and Trout Fishing will be 
two of the many wonderful musicians appearing at the Revel this year.  Oh 
man!  Trout Fishing is playing on Saturday October 1, and Mr. Walker will 
be doing his thing on the following Saturday.  Harold and I are already 
planning ahead.  We're gonna show up early enough to get front row.

love, The Doctor 

[ The Revel is a Shreveport local art/crafts  ]
[ fair that's a lot of fun and has always had ]
[ good music and good food.  If you're in the ]
[ East Texas/North-west Louisiana area around ]
[ mid-August, look into visting the area.     ]

*********************************************************************

[ From Kirk (the SquidMeister)  ]

http://www.xensei.com/users/iraseski/

all you ever needed to know about [Moxie]!

[ This page is one of the worst looking pages I've come  ]
[ across, but it does explain something I've always been ]
[ curious about.  Give it a look-see for yourself.       ]

*********************************************************************

[ For Windows '95 users (or you can file this for when    ]
[ you start using Win'95) from: Steve . ]

Subject: Windows 95 - Easter Egg

http://www.cris.com/~randybrg/easter.egg.html

In case you've been wondering how to activate the Win95 
credits, here it is. If you have a sound card,
there is music that is played with it and it's not bad.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Right click on the desktop - Select "New Folder" and name the 
folder:

and now, the moment you've all been waiting for

Right click the folder and rename it to:

we proudly present for your viewing pleasure

Right click the folder and rename it again to:

The Microsoft Windows 95 Product Team!

Make sure that you type EXACTLY what is written above and this 
is case sensitive. If you are cutting and pasting
this (which is the best way) make sure there are no spaces at 
the end of the folder name also.

Open the folder and enjoy!