Hey everybody! It’s the Preserving Innovation in Telecom Act of 2005

neither any State or local government, nor any entity affiliated with such a government, shall provide any telecommunications, telecommunications service, information service, or cable service in any geographic area within the jurisdiction of such government in which a corporation or other private entity that is not affiliated with any State or local government is offering a substantially similar service.

OK, I get it, so Republicans believe that the federal government should use its power to prevent those invasive local and municipal governments from infringing on corporations’ god-given rights to overcharge for Internet service.