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Butt-Numb-A-Thon 6

Becky and I just returned from BNAT6. Eventually I’ll post some commentary and schwag pics, but for now just a list of items we saw and then it’s time for a nap.

Before I get into being anal about this, I need to throw out some big “Thank Yous!”

First and foremost to the big red guy for the holiday season cheer. Now that I’m starting to question whether Santa is real, Harry Knowles is usurping Santa’s place in my belief system. Second (to nobody) is Tim and his beautiful wife Karrie League for sharing their dream with Austin and hosting this affair. The charity that BNAT supports, Saturday Morning Film Club, is one of the most subversive and generous ideas for entertaining children — especially considering neither of these guys has kids…AFAIK. The fact that they do it with BBBS — which my wife, Becky, is part of and loves — is even that much better. Also, thanks to all the regular AICN folks for helping, especially Moriarty and Quint.

Thanks to the studios and the specific people working in the industry who offered up trailers, slides, clips and movies. It is easy to forget that real people were involved in getting this material approved and shipped to BNAT, but I want you to know that all of us appreciate your faith in our love of all things cinematic and your trust that we prize your “intellectual property” as much as you do.

Last, thanks of course to all my fellow BNATers for providing the supportive community that makes staying up 24+ hours easy. I don’t spend enough time getting to know all of you but seeing and hearing you share this passion for film with me makes you my friend. Thanks to the group of friends who applied with me, particularly Becky and Michael Reeves who had to sit next to me the whole time.

(Items in parentheses are not full-length features.) They are shorts, trailers, behind the scenes, etc. We saw a LOT of shorts and trailers so I didn’t list them all — only the ones that stood out for me.

Updated 12/13/2004 3:00 pm (final update?)

On-screen:

• (Putney Swope) – clip from Robert Downy Sr.‘s experimental (and supposedly ground-breaking) movie dealing with turn-of-the-70’s race issues featuring a musical number of an interracial couple singing about love at first sight that turns into an acne cream commercial. I am going to grab this on DVD this week.
• Willie McBean & His Magic Machine – this is the first full-length feature film from Rankin-Bass — the guys who brought you the original stop-motion animation shorts of Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer and The Year Without a Santa Claus (and my favorite Christmas gig, ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas) — it’s a hilarious blend of pseudo-hishory and Rankin-Bass-esque fantasy.
• Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events – I only moderately like the books because they are too pessimistic. I only moderate liked the film because it comes off as if it were a movie summation of the first three books…because it is. It is gorgeous and well-acted though even considring “Ham” Carrey. The Q&A with Emily Browning and Liam Aiken was refreshing since they weren’t as polished as career-weathered actors would have been.
• (Madagascar) – two unfinshed clips from Dreamworks’ upcoming animation flick show the movie will be a lot funnier than the trailer would lead you to think. Hover over this nonsense for a spoiler that you will forget before the movie is released in Spring 2005: GOBBLEDEGOOK.
• The Black Swan – Despite the drive to finish every scene in one take to keep costs low during the war, Tyrone Power’s swashbuckler with Maureen O’Hara is an excellent pirate film. (I keep trying to think Tyrone Powers was closeted…but I may be thinking of somone else. Can anyone clear that up for me?)
• (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy) – Executive Producer Robbie Stamp brought us a slide show of early work on HHGTTG including the stills at Yahoo plus the first public look at the Vogons creature costumes, and he did a Q&A. I really liked his put-down of the netizens who dis Mos Def as an actor. He explained that the casting director caught MD on stage in London and thought he’d be great for the roll.
• Blonde Venus – Considering the release date (1932) of this film, it’s a suprisingly complex storyline about Marlene Dietrich’s character selling herself to pay for her husband’s health recovery and then trying to keep custody of her son when her husband kicks her to the curb. It is also a fairly strong approach to female independence for it’s time.
• (Legend of the Sacred Stone) – clip from a kung-fu anime-style with marionettes. I gotta find this on DVD sometime.
• Miss Sadie Thompson – The Dowtown Drafthouse was the sixth modern theater in the country with the equipment to show this stunning 3D film shot in Hawaii. 3D aside, the story does a really progressive job of twisting between the balances of morality and second chances.
• (War of the Worlds) – Spielberg and Cruise introduced this teaser. Like most teasers there wasn’t eneugh meat to get me interested.
• The Phantom of the Opera – my wife still isn’t worried that she married a gay man… I love Phantom, and Schumacher does an excellent schmaltzy job of bringing Weber to the big screen. The prevelance of “theatre” (note the “re” spelling) cheesiness is understandable and he only turns the gay up to 11 during “Masquerade”…which is still understandable. It’s a little sad that the movie version will neccesarily exclude non-fans of musical theater but at least it is faithful to Weber’s vision.
• (Welcome Home Brother Charles) – this trailer is for a little known blaxploitation film that ends up about a man who kills women with…i won’t spoil it, but as usual for this genre he blames the Man for his problems.
• (The Ring Two) – first public showing of the new trailer and I’m pretty excited about this one. I’ve always thought the first film left too many unanswered questions like: doesn’t the law of diminishing returns guaranty that someone is going to get stuck watching the video who can’t bamboozle someone else into seeing it?, and once samara kills that persen how does she get more people to see it? Actually, it doesn’t look like this movie is going to answer any of these questions, but it does look like the storyline has some more flavor left in it.
• The Mutations – this movie is actually kind of a stale sci-fi/suspense thing, but the Q&A before the film with director Robert Weinbach proved fascinating as he discussed the human reality of the lives of the freaks. It was probably choir-preaching but he tried to impress on us that even people with wild physical deformities lead normal lives.
• Toys Are Not for Children – as usual Tim got to pick the 4am movie and he specializes in shockingly twisted 70s teensploitation. This film was no different as it followed the story of a girl with seperated parents who lives with her bitter mother. Her otherwise absent dad sends her a new toy every year and she loves her dad…by the end of the movie she really does love her dad…
• Layer Cake – Matthew Vaughn, who producod Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch, takes over directing a movie in the same genre and does a bang-up job. This will go down as a classic British gangster action movie. Lead actor Daniel Craig has a good lead-actor future ahead of him after two top-notch 2004 movies (although be sure you’re in a good place before you see his current stalker movie, Enduring Love). The Q&A after the film with Tamar Hussan was entertaining, too.
• (2001 Maniacs) – Eli Roth (previous/current BNATer and Cabin Fever director) brought us a completely Roth-appropriate clip from this movie that he’s producing. And by Roth-appropriate I mean completely degenerate.
• (Casshern) – I am over the need of directors (particularly in Japanese fantasy films) to take the first 5-10 minutes of a film to describe to the viewer in intricate detail the particular way the world got warped to end up in the twisted predicament that their film is about. If you can’t just tell the story then maybe it’s not worth it. However, the fight scene we saw — the second clip after the really long verbal exposition clip — was pretty cool.
• Ong-bak – I own this film — ordered from an overseas DVD store — and it’s awesome. Now with subtitles (So, that’s what they’re saying!) and a new soundtrack, it looks like an American theatrical release may happen beyond the film festival showings.
• (Time Piece) – This was shown twice during the night and I only mention it to note how warped Jim Henson was from early on.
• (The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe) – some behind the scenes creature work from the same guys who did it for LOTR shows that this film at least won’t be cheap.

• Kung Fu Hustle – I’m a big Chow fan but I understand that not everyone gets him, like not everyone gets Mel Brooks. I really enjoyed this, especially the heavy homages to Kill Bill and Uzumaki.

Poster Roll:

• Blade Trinity (one sheet, 2 of)²
• The Manchurian Candidate (one sheet, 2 of)²
• Lemony Snicket (one sheet, 2 of)²
• The Human Stain (double-sided one sheet, 1 of)
• Finding Neverland (one sheet, 1 of)
• SAW (double-sided one sheet, 2 of²)
• Team America (one sheet, 2 of²)
• Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow (one sheet, 2 of²)
• Dirty Pretty Things (one sheet, 1 of)
• Danny Deckchair (one sheet, 1 of)

• Shaun of the Dead (folded 22” x 34”, 1 of)

In the (goodie) bag:

• BNAT t-shirt and yearbook (XXL,Baby T)
• Willard t-shirt (L²,XL)
• Shaft muscle t-shirt (M, 2 of)²
• Sleepy Hollow t-shirt (L)
• Exorcist: The Beginning t-shirt (XL)
• Festival Express t-shirt (XL)
• Sky Captian t-shirt (XL)
• Patriot Games t-shirt (XL, 2 of)²
• The Relic t-shirt (L, 2 of)²
• Escape From LA t-shirt (XL, 2 of)
• Raise Your Voice t-shirt (Baseball Baby T)
• South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut Boxers (L, 2 of)²
• Blade Trinity stickers (2 of)²
• Butterfly Effect sweatband (Thanks so much, Ashton!)
• Seed of Chucky mask (2 of)²
• Star Trek Nemesis calculator (2 of)²
• School of Rock cube notepad
• Motorcycle Diaries CD sampler ²
• A Slipping-Down Life CD sampler
• Exorcist: The Beginning shoulder bag
• Mean Girls on board window decal ²
• Star Wars mini-statues
• Willard rubbur squeaky rat
• Seed of Chucky stress sperm (2 of)²
• Danny Deckchair balloon
• The Italian Job window decal
• Remember the Magdalenes protest postcards ²
• Lemony Snicket temp tattoos ²
• SAW round stickers ²
• Napoleon Dynamite lip balm
• Without a Paddle DVD sampler ²
• The Ring Two cell phone charms (3 of) ²
• Catwoman keychain
• School of Rock plastic shot glass (2 of) ²
• Scary Movie 2 button
• Danny Deckchair stickers (2 of, yellow and blue)
• Sky Captain collectors cards
• Christmas with the Cranks activity book ²
• Sky Captain vintage-style comic
• Lord of the Rings Weapons and Warfare

• Shark Tales shower curtain

²Dear fellow BNATers, friends and film geeks-

One of the benefits of attending BNAT with my wonderful and lovely wife is we get to double-up on some of the schwag. Barring divorce induced cataclysm (say, for example, only having one ticket to BNAT7 between us) that means we have two of some things that we’d be willing to part with one. Anything marked on our list (²) is available for trade. Let us know what you are interested in and what you might have that is tradeworthy. Our tastes are fairly wide open, so don’t be shy about offers — particularly if you have anfthing related to From Justin to Kelly. (And if you are simply apopletic about an unmarked item, let me know and be prepared to come up with Bring It On or Punch Drunk Love level schwag.)

Thanks, John Osmon aka Johnny Rollerfeet aka etrigan aka jaireaux

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