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By becky - Last updated: Tuesday, August 5, 2003 - Save & Share - 7 Comments

I’m trying not to form an opinion on the Kobe Bryant thing, but I’ll admit that my first gut reaction was “Why the hell would she go up to his room?”

This article puts me in my place:

Posted in Rants • • Top Of Page

7 Responses to “Wow.”

Comment from cynsmith
Time August 5, 2003 at 2:59 pm

Me too! I read that (courtesy of RabbitBlog) yesterday and thought “Oh, yeah. Hmmm, blame the victim might not be the right way to go here…”

Thanks for posting it.

Comment from jank
Time August 5, 2003 at 3:47 pm

I’d missed that on Page 2 the first time around. Mostly because I’m willing to leave my judgement of Mr. Bryant and his accuser to a jury of their peers.

But, it goes even further towards my recommendation that Page 2 be near the top of anyone who enjoys good writing’s bookmarks.

Comment from etrigan
Time August 5, 2003 at 3:49 pm

I am really ashamed of you two.

I will be blunt about my imagined chain of events. (We all have the scene played out in our minds. Polite people just pretend they don’t.) She went up to his room thinking “I will give him a BJ, but that is as far as I will go.” She knew ahead of time where she would stop and I imagine she clearly stated it, at some point during the interaction. He did not stop when she said to.

It is hard to stop the momentum of an event like this when you have a preconceived notion of where it will end. Unfortunately, when one person’s notion is different than the other’s (or as happens often the other person comes to the event without a clear set of goals and limits) the negotiation gets messy. Kobe should know that these negotiations stop when the girl says stop. He should pay the price of his transgressions (jail and/or money) so that sports figures and fans see what happens when you violate another person’s rights. Then, maybe, it will happen less often.

As much as I dislike the man’s rulings (in general) Clarence Thomas pushed the tipping point of sexual harrassment in the workplace. (I realize it still happens, but not to the scale it used to.) A high profile “date rape” case will add one more very big brick to the wall that stops this type of event.

Comment from cynsmith
Time August 5, 2003 at 5:20 pm

“I am really ashamed of you two.”

What the hell does this mean?

Comment from etrigan
Time August 5, 2003 at 9:28 pm

yeah, I was too harsh in my typing (but it wasn’t in my spirt — I promise.)

When I heard story without details I was dubious, but when some of the details were released I immediately put the burden of responsibility on Kobe. A professional of any type should know that perception is truth and a 19 year-old girl spending time in a married athlete’s hotel room (having sex with him, no less) can only be percieved one way.

(unless you are R. Kelly and think far enough ahead to get it all on tape.)

(…Lord, I apologize…)

Comment from Jank
Time August 5, 2003 at 11:05 pm

(When the) “details were released I immediately put the burden of responsibility on Kobe”

I don’t think that this point has been made often enough. Like I said, I’m not ready to send the guy up the river until he’s gone to trial, but how hard is it to realize that 20 years after the launch of cable, and 10 years after the effective launch of the Internet, that if you’re a figure in the public eye, and you’re doing stupid stuff, you are going to get busted. Period.

Hubris. Even the Greeks had this figured out on the other edge of history.

Comment from cynsmith
Time August 7, 2003 at 10:20 am

Well, I don’t think that athletes (or Winona, for that matter) get busted EVERY time they do something stupid. It’s just that if they make a habit out of doing stupid shit, they’ll get busted eventually.

I think that’s true for most of us, though…

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